Tuesday, July 22, 2008
I lost my latest trial
but I looked good doing it. I think they must teach the prosecutors in my state to wear pocket squares for trial because the one I encounter fairly often almost always wears one. I happen to love pocket squares so I wore one for my last trial. One nice thing I will say about prosecutors, for the most part the dress better than defense attorneys. Defense attorneys wear the absolute worst clothes. Grey plaid pants + white jacket + cream shirt + green tie = Awful outfit. Not ok for court. Seriously look in a mirror. I don't care how good of an attorney you are, you shouldn't be allowed to look that awful in court. I don't care that your client has paint stains and holes in his pants, he's indigent.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Book Reviews
Awhile ago I read "Defending the Damned" and was a little disappointed in it. It was just ok to me. The author kept calling redirect recross and I would have liked to hear about more than just the murder unit. Also I'm not a huge fan of the court system in Chicago (since it's so corrupt).
Many people suggested I read "Indefensible" by David Feige. While I'm not a huge fan of New York either, I thought this was a much much better book. It helped that it was written by an actual public defender. You can tell Mr. Feige cares about the job and the people he represents and wants others to understand. I liked his candid admissions when he did something wrong. It is so scary that defendants get one shot and there entire lives can be ruined because the luck of the draw gave them an attorney who for one reason or another screwed something up. If you haven't read it, I recommend it. You can buy it from Mr. Feige's website.
After "Indefensible" I picked up a copy of "Gideon's Trumped" by Anthony Lewis at a used book store. This is an old book (from 1964) but it tells the story of Clarance Earl Gideon and his case created my future career. It is so weird reading the book and realizing Miranda hadn't been decided yet. Criminal procedure sucked a lot before the 1960s. It astonishes me that less than 60 years ago people were forced to represent themselves in felony cases. I've had two years of law school and I was barely able to handle a simple misdemeanor case. Before law school I'm not sure I would have been able to fight a traffic ticket intelligently. I was glad to learn that once he finally got his new trial Gideon was acquitted.
Many people suggested I read "Indefensible" by David Feige. While I'm not a huge fan of New York either, I thought this was a much much better book. It helped that it was written by an actual public defender. You can tell Mr. Feige cares about the job and the people he represents and wants others to understand. I liked his candid admissions when he did something wrong. It is so scary that defendants get one shot and there entire lives can be ruined because the luck of the draw gave them an attorney who for one reason or another screwed something up. If you haven't read it, I recommend it. You can buy it from Mr. Feige's website.
After "Indefensible" I picked up a copy of "Gideon's Trumped" by Anthony Lewis at a used book store. This is an old book (from 1964) but it tells the story of Clarance Earl Gideon and his case created my future career. It is so weird reading the book and realizing Miranda hadn't been decided yet. Criminal procedure sucked a lot before the 1960s. It astonishes me that less than 60 years ago people were forced to represent themselves in felony cases. I've had two years of law school and I was barely able to handle a simple misdemeanor case. Before law school I'm not sure I would have been able to fight a traffic ticket intelligently. I was glad to learn that once he finally got his new trial Gideon was acquitted.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
PS
5. I'm sorry again about the confusion with your last court date. Things worked out in the end though, your case still got dismissed. Please keep your shit together so we don't see you again. You are to smart to pull that kind of stupid shit.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Letters
I realize this will come as no surprise to any of the real PDs who read this, but I didn't realize that prosecutors didn't know the law. I didn't realize that part of my job was teaching them the law.
Dear Prosecutor,
Why am I asking you to dismiss this case? Well let's consider this case that is directly on point that says the stop is bad. With no probable cause for the stop all the evidence after the stop becomes fruit of the poisonous tree and must be excluded. This stop was based entirely on X. My case says that stops based on X lack probable cause. Thus this stop lacked probable cause. All of the evidence in this case is a result of a search incident to arrest. A search incident to arrest is not valid if the initial stop lacked probable cause.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Prosecutor,
Thank you for responding by telling me that I've read the case incorrectly by citing to an older case not on point. In the future I won't be helpful and I won't summarize the case for you. In the future I will just copy and paste the direct quotes that say I'm right and you're wrong. In the future I will treat you like a child. Additionally here is a direct quote from my case directly on point showing you that I'm right.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Prosecutor,
No I will not agree to a continuance for you to respond to my motion. I shouldn't have to write this motion, you should be dismissing the case.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Clients,
1. Thank you for missing your appointment. I didn't need to meet with you to prepare a defense for your case. I'm such an amazing intern and my supervisor is such an amazing attorney that we are able to prepare defenses without knowing your side of the case. Also it's nice that you didn't show up because I didn't want to wear a t-shirt and jeans, but instead wanted to wear something a little more professional in this heat. I enjoy sweating.
2. Thank you for not returning my numerous calls. Negotiating with the prosecutor has been very easy not knowing if you have completed the numerous things discussed. Oh you weren't going to do that until you heard from me whether the prosecutor would give us a deal? And you were going to learn this from me how? So I was supposed to lie to the prosecutor and tell him you'd done X and if he agreed to the deal you would then actually do X? Ok well allow me to be the first to welcome you to the real world. In the real world things don't work like that. Sorry to have to be the one to tell you that.
3. You are crazy and for the first time I was uncomfortable being alone in my office with a client. I don't believe you, you need medication and lots and lots of counseling. I'm not that torn up over the fact that you might lose your kid because I'm not sure you should be around children. Also I am not your divorce attorney.
4. Why must you insist on taking the crappy plea when I think there is a good trial issue? You are held on other far more serious charges anyway so its not like you would be getting out of jail anytime soon. You wouldn't even have to testify. You just sit there and act pretty while I conduct a trial. The worst that happens is almost identical to the crappy plea offer. Shit more jail time really means is that the judge can revoke less of it when you violate the terms of probation.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Prosecutor,
Why am I asking you to dismiss this case? Well let's consider this case that is directly on point that says the stop is bad. With no probable cause for the stop all the evidence after the stop becomes fruit of the poisonous tree and must be excluded. This stop was based entirely on X. My case says that stops based on X lack probable cause. Thus this stop lacked probable cause. All of the evidence in this case is a result of a search incident to arrest. A search incident to arrest is not valid if the initial stop lacked probable cause.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Prosecutor,
Thank you for responding by telling me that I've read the case incorrectly by citing to an older case not on point. In the future I won't be helpful and I won't summarize the case for you. In the future I will just copy and paste the direct quotes that say I'm right and you're wrong. In the future I will treat you like a child. Additionally here is a direct quote from my case directly on point showing you that I'm right.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Prosecutor,
No I will not agree to a continuance for you to respond to my motion. I shouldn't have to write this motion, you should be dismissing the case.
Sincerely,
Petition
Dear Clients,
1. Thank you for missing your appointment. I didn't need to meet with you to prepare a defense for your case. I'm such an amazing intern and my supervisor is such an amazing attorney that we are able to prepare defenses without knowing your side of the case. Also it's nice that you didn't show up because I didn't want to wear a t-shirt and jeans, but instead wanted to wear something a little more professional in this heat. I enjoy sweating.
2. Thank you for not returning my numerous calls. Negotiating with the prosecutor has been very easy not knowing if you have completed the numerous things discussed. Oh you weren't going to do that until you heard from me whether the prosecutor would give us a deal? And you were going to learn this from me how? So I was supposed to lie to the prosecutor and tell him you'd done X and if he agreed to the deal you would then actually do X? Ok well allow me to be the first to welcome you to the real world. In the real world things don't work like that. Sorry to have to be the one to tell you that.
3. You are crazy and for the first time I was uncomfortable being alone in my office with a client. I don't believe you, you need medication and lots and lots of counseling. I'm not that torn up over the fact that you might lose your kid because I'm not sure you should be around children. Also I am not your divorce attorney.
4. Why must you insist on taking the crappy plea when I think there is a good trial issue? You are held on other far more serious charges anyway so its not like you would be getting out of jail anytime soon. You wouldn't even have to testify. You just sit there and act pretty while I conduct a trial. The worst that happens is almost identical to the crappy plea offer. Shit more jail time really means is that the judge can revoke less of it when you violate the terms of probation.
Sincerely,
Petition
Monday, July 7, 2008
NOT GUILTY
on the one and only charge. I only second chaired this one, but I'm claiming total victory. I argued the motions in liminie, motions that were made entirely from taking other attorneys motions and placing the defendant's name into them. The judge felt the need to chastise me for them and insult my evidence professor for not teaching me evidence correctly. What sucked is that the judge was right the motion was wrong and misunderstood the rules of evidence. But I did as this job has taught me, stood there and took it, thanked the judge and moved on. I got to object a lot more at this trial than in my last trial.
I left the following as a comment to my previous post, but I feel the need to post it here to better clarify what actually happened in my previous case. I really need to edit this thing a little better.
I didn't wink wink or nudge nudge. Nor did I advise him to lie. I can see how my post kind of came across like that. To clarify I only asked him if his story was in fact more like the story in the police report. When I said "if you were X" I was referring to what was said in the police report, I didn't suggest a wild new story that came out of nowhere. I wanted to make sure he wasn't lying to me to make me think he was innocent so I explained that even if things were like they read in the police report we could still mount an effective defense.
I didn't advise him to lie. I informed him that he didn't need to tell me a better story than the one contained in the police report. I really think he thought that his story needed to be about complete innocence. My questions to him were to explain that even if what he said didn't paint him as 100% angel we could still mount a defense.
I left the following as a comment to my previous post, but I feel the need to post it here to better clarify what actually happened in my previous case. I really need to edit this thing a little better.
I didn't wink wink or nudge nudge. Nor did I advise him to lie. I can see how my post kind of came across like that. To clarify I only asked him if his story was in fact more like the story in the police report. When I said "if you were X" I was referring to what was said in the police report, I didn't suggest a wild new story that came out of nowhere. I wanted to make sure he wasn't lying to me to make me think he was innocent so I explained that even if things were like they read in the police report we could still mount an effective defense.
I didn't advise him to lie. I informed him that he didn't need to tell me a better story than the one contained in the police report. I really think he thought that his story needed to be about complete innocence. My questions to him were to explain that even if what he said didn't paint him as 100% angel we could still mount a defense.
Monday, June 30, 2008
NOT GUILTY
of one charge, guilty of the other. So I'm claiming a victory. A very sweet victory considering that the defendant blatantly lied on the stand, told a bullshit story (which amounted to "the cop is lying"), constantly wrote me notes during trial says "That a lie" "He's a liar" ect. large enough that I'm pretty sure the jury could see, visible reacted to the police officers testimony constantly and was just a general pain the ass. He got sentenced to the amount of time he has already served and the mandatory minimum fine. He's going to appeal, he's going to lose and the court is going to impose costs on him.
My voir dire was pretty bad, my opening was ok, my cross of the police officer was pretty good, my direct sucked (not my fault my client was a moron) and I think my closing was pretty solid. I learned that I'm not very good at voir dire, cross comes naturally to me and jurors who give me the evil eye during closing worry me. Yeah I'm talking about your juror #3 I should have used a peremptory on you.
If only he would have accepted my subtle hints at how his testimony should be. Hey you thickheaded moron when I say "if you were X then I could argue Y", that is your cue to change your story to X. Don't continue to give me Z, I know Z is bullshit, so if you insist on giving me bullshit please give me the bullshit that I can work with. The last story you tell me is the story I will believe. There is a reason we go over the elements of the crime and the possible defenses before we ask for your version of events. Wink wink nudge nudge.
I can't get over how shocked the defendant was when the guilty verdict was read. His entire defense to the charge was that the cop was lying. I told him, my supervisor told him and another attorney told him that it was an uphill battle and that his chances were not good.
To recap, first trial and I can claim victory. I never really thought I had a realistic chance with the first charge and I'm happy I won the second charge. Next time Not Guilty on all charges. Next time a defendant who isn't a complete tool.
My voir dire was pretty bad, my opening was ok, my cross of the police officer was pretty good, my direct sucked (not my fault my client was a moron) and I think my closing was pretty solid. I learned that I'm not very good at voir dire, cross comes naturally to me and jurors who give me the evil eye during closing worry me. Yeah I'm talking about your juror #3 I should have used a peremptory on you.
If only he would have accepted my subtle hints at how his testimony should be. Hey you thickheaded moron when I say "if you were X then I could argue Y", that is your cue to change your story to X. Don't continue to give me Z, I know Z is bullshit, so if you insist on giving me bullshit please give me the bullshit that I can work with. The last story you tell me is the story I will believe. There is a reason we go over the elements of the crime and the possible defenses before we ask for your version of events. Wink wink nudge nudge.
I can't get over how shocked the defendant was when the guilty verdict was read. His entire defense to the charge was that the cop was lying. I told him, my supervisor told him and another attorney told him that it was an uphill battle and that his chances were not good.
To recap, first trial and I can claim victory. I never really thought I had a realistic chance with the first charge and I'm happy I won the second charge. Next time Not Guilty on all charges. Next time a defendant who isn't a complete tool.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Today was rough, tomorrow looks better
I screwed up and didn't do something I was supposed to. Not a big deal, and no one told me I had to do it, I just probably should have known. Didn't hurt anything and other circumstances ended up making my mistake moot.
Judge was an asshole extraordinaire today (and not because of my mistake, he didn't even know about my mistake). He's racist, unfair and rude. Although he sure speeds through the pleas so we can get out of there much faster than the other judge. I prefer nice and reasonable to quick though. So happy my trial next week is in front of the nice judge.
I'm very frustrated with my pain in the ass clients taking so much of my time. I can't help you dude, there are no issues for trial in your case. Sure we can still go to trial but its a bad bad idea. Stop calling me your trial isn't until August, let me work on the person who might have trial next week. She has important issues that should win at trial. I haven't spoken with her in weeks because she doesn't call and I'm too busy dealing useless clients bullshit.
My next trial does not have nearly as good of issues as my first attempted trial. Frankly the client should have plead to the first offer. Unfortunately he has chosen to exercise his right to a trial with a jury of peers. A jury of his peers that is going to convict the hell out of him. That is the last negative thing I'm going to say. All of tomorrow I'm going to be positive and psych myself up for winning. That's right you heard it hear first Petition is going to win his first trial.
I'm so sick and tired of ironing shirts for work. I hate dry cleaning (and I'm cheap, oh so very cheap) so I launder my shirts on my own. Plus I'm good at ironing. When it was a less frequent thing and wearing nice shirts was just for pleasure I found ironing relaxing and a nice break from the hectic pace of law school. Now ironing is just a chore that has to be done everyday.
Judge was an asshole extraordinaire today (and not because of my mistake, he didn't even know about my mistake). He's racist, unfair and rude. Although he sure speeds through the pleas so we can get out of there much faster than the other judge. I prefer nice and reasonable to quick though. So happy my trial next week is in front of the nice judge.
I'm very frustrated with my pain in the ass clients taking so much of my time. I can't help you dude, there are no issues for trial in your case. Sure we can still go to trial but its a bad bad idea. Stop calling me your trial isn't until August, let me work on the person who might have trial next week. She has important issues that should win at trial. I haven't spoken with her in weeks because she doesn't call and I'm too busy dealing useless clients bullshit.
My next trial does not have nearly as good of issues as my first attempted trial. Frankly the client should have plead to the first offer. Unfortunately he has chosen to exercise his right to a trial with a jury of peers. A jury of his peers that is going to convict the hell out of him. That is the last negative thing I'm going to say. All of tomorrow I'm going to be positive and psych myself up for winning. That's right you heard it hear first Petition is going to win his first trial.
I'm so sick and tired of ironing shirts for work. I hate dry cleaning (and I'm cheap, oh so very cheap) so I launder my shirts on my own. Plus I'm good at ironing. When it was a less frequent thing and wearing nice shirts was just for pleasure I found ironing relaxing and a nice break from the hectic pace of law school. Now ironing is just a chore that has to be done everyday.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)